Cobbler
Cobbler is delicious, this I need not tell you. In fact there was a time when I would eat my body weight in cobbler
DAILY
No let me change the topic for a second.
I worked at a summer camp last summer and, the people running the camp decided it would be a nice gesture to let each employee have one week off to recharge. During my one week off of camp, I went home. However my parents were kinda jerks and took off with my brother to Germany so I had to stay home with my Grandmother whom had been staying with us at the time. Now time to change the subject again (I might pull this back together in the end…
or not).
Now, to explain a little bit about myself, I have two Grandmothers, however, when staying at my house they are not known by their last names!
No, in fact, they are known as Cookie Grandma and Cobbler Grandma. Needless to say I have trouble keeping weight off when they are around!
So coming back a little bit to the point, the Grandmother staying with me during my week off was Cobbler Grandma (If you couldn’t figure it out from the title of this post) and much cobbler was devoured.
Leaving the point again, I went back to camp the next Sunday and started noticing that I was feeling a little weird, and my fecal matter was discolored a deep black, much like a ninja’s mask. I told my boss, and went to the health center.
I’m going to leave that point for a little side note here, when your poo is black it usually means there is blood in your stool, so in short, I THOUGHT I WAS DYING!
Back up a paragraph, at the health center they were concerned for the same reason I was and shipped me into town for some tests, thank God they came back negative. (I don’t think the kids would be too happy if their counsellor had to peace out because his colon was Freddy Kruegerized). I went back to the health clinic and, the doctor told me that he was glad the results came back that way but was still baffled as to why my doodoo looked like I drank all the food coloring. Then the light upstairs started to come on. The doctor asked me if I had eaten any blue berries recently, and if you go back to the top of this post and insert blue berry in front of ever cobbler I have written thus far, it would be easy to realize, yes, I ate a plethora of blue berries. I ate so many blue berries, the price of blue berries went up six dollars…
A Berry!
So of course I told the doctor, “why yes, I have consumed unparalleled amounts of blue berries over the past seven days.”
And he said, “this kind of surprised me, but I was reading just recently, blue berries are one of the highest sources of iron on the planet.”
That’s about when it clicked…
I knew that, but of course, iron in the stool means hemoglobin, which means blood, which means internal bleeding, which means DEATH!
How could on little blue fruit be so evil…
