I’m Pissed!
So I have a serious beef with the big guy right now.
It’s the 20th of April, the weather has been gorgeous, I even was able to get a two hour bike ride in on Easter Sunday.
But today sucks.
Want to know why?
Well I don’t know what stupid place you live in, but all you have to do here is look outside.
In ten day’s it will be May, you know, April showers bring May flowers?
April blizzards piss me off, and probably kill May flowers.
Every year…
With out fail…
There is a snow storm in April that just makes all the other snow storms look like Popsicles?
Just once, I would like to have an April where I can sleep outside in my hamockand not have to worry about waking up with hypothermia.
Just once, I would like to be able to have an April with out a snow day.
I don’t know what we did God, but seriously!?!?!
I would rather have a plague of lotus…
Or locust, I can’t remember which one was the good one…
It’s not like we have any craps to devour with all this snow…
Or crops, I can’t remember which was the one we wanted…
Point being, I am filing a formal complaint with the global weather control. This is unacceptable!
Is There Anything More Unreasonable?
So normally I wouldn’t update twice in the same half hour, but something unexpected happened on my way to class, I ran into the most unreasonable creature of all God’s creations. This thing hates everyone and everything, it even hates vegetation, puddles and Frisbee! I have never seen something lay ravage to nature like this thing, which I might add IS PART OF NATURE. I am talking of course about the Canadian Goose. You can tell by it’s name that it’s unreasonable (i.e. Canadian) and it’s actions are so closely related to actual Canadians that it’s no wonder why it is referred to as such. The Canadian Goose is a very diligent creature that will not rest until every last square acre of land, and probably water, is defecated upon! And this is an animal we protect under the endangered species protection act of 1966. What is a reasonable solution for such an unreasonable? Well the only reasonable answer would be an unreasonable one, so in lue of suggesting nuclear Holocaust I will just suggest moving southward, where the Mexican Goose reigns supreme.
